700+ Christmas Joke; Funny, Flirty and Cheesy for 2025

Looking for the best Christmas joke for 2025 to sleigh your group chats, parties, or Instagram captions? 🎄

You’ve come to the right winter wonderland of humor!

If you’re after funny, flirty, or downright cheesy Christmas jokes, we’ve unwrapped over 700+ hilarious one-liners to make spirits bright and mistletoe moments unforgettable.

From modern memes to classic puns, this collection is your ultimate sleigh ride to laughter.

So grab your cocoa, scroll on, and get ready to laugh like Santa just told you his best punchline! 😄✨

Christmas Joke for Kids 🎄👧🧒

Why did Santa go to music school 🎶 Because he wanted to improve his wrapping skills 🎁
What do you call an elf who sings 🎤 A wrapper
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack 💪 An abdominal snowman
Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber ✂️ It needed a trim
How does a snowman get around 🚗 By riding an “icicle”
Why was the ornament addicted to Christmas 🌟 It was hooked on trees
What do elves use to take notes ✏️ Their elf-abet
Why did the turkey join the band 🦃 Because it had the drumsticks
Where does Santa keep his money 💰 At the snowbank
What’s Santa’s favorite subject in school 🏫 Ho-ho-history
Why do mummies love Christmas 🎁 Because of all the wrapping
What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees 🦌 Horn-aments
What kind of photos do elves take 📸 Elfies
What do you get if you cross a snowman and a dog 🐶 Frostbite
What does Mrs. Claus say to Santa when there are clouds ☁️ It looks like rain, dear

SNL Weekend Update Christmas Joke Swap 🎙️😂

Michael Che says Santa’s real gift is unpaid labor 🎅
Colin Jost calls Rudolph the original Uber driver 🦌
Che jokes that elves unionized and now Santa uses Amazon
Jost: Santa doesn’t check lists, he stalks social media 📱
Che: The Grinch is just a guy who ran out of PTO
Jost: Frosty melted because of global warming, Merry Christmas ❄️
Che: My Christmas spirit died when I saw my credit card bill 💳
Jost: Mistletoe now requires written consent 💋
Che: Santa’s sleigh runs on broken dreams and reindeer gas
Jost: Elf on the Shelf has been replaced by Drone in the Zone
Che: Carolers showed up and I called security
Jost: Reindeer games are just HR violations waiting to happen
Che: Eggnog is just holiday regret in a cup 🥃
Jost: My tree lights work better than Congress
Che: Even Santa’s sleigh has student loans 🎓

Christmas Joke of the Day 🌟🎅

What do you call a greedy elf 💰 Elfish
Why did Santa get a parking ticket 🚓 He left his sleigh in a snow zone
What’s every elf’s favorite type of music 🎶 Wrap
Why don’t you ever see Santa in hospital 🏥 Because he has private elf care
How does Santa keep his suits wrinkle-free 👔 Claus-tarch
What do you call Santa when he stops moving 🛑 Santa Pause
Why does Santa wear a red suit ❤️ Because it’s Claus-ic
What did one Christmas tree say to the other 🎄 Lighten up
Why was the snowman looking through the carrots 🥕 He was picking his nose
What happens to you if you eat Christmas decorations 🎇 You get tinsel-itis
What do you get when Santa becomes a detective 🔍 Santa Clues
Why did the Christmas cookie cry 🍪 Because its mom was a wafer too long
What’s a sheep’s favorite Christmas song 🎵 Fleece Navidad
Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee ☕ Because they’re Santa’s star bucks
What did Santa say when he stepped on a LEGO 🧱 Ho Ho OWWW

Funny Christmas Joke 😂🎄

I bought my dad a fridge for Christmas His face lit up when he saw it
Christmas is just a big fat man breaking into your house to eat cookies 🍪
The only thing getting lit this Christmas is the tree
Dear Santa, I can explain…
Santa saw your social media He’s skipping your house
I tried to be good, but I got bored
What’s the best Christmas present 🎁 A broken drum — you just can’t beat it
I wrapped empty boxes and put them under the tree Just for the dramatic effect
Christmas calories don’t count 🍰
Santa’s favorite snack? Ho-Ho-Hos
I told my kids I ate Santa’s cookies They cried. I laughed
Why did Santa get kicked out of the mall? Because he kept saying YOLO-HO-HO
My family’s Christmas dinner could be a horror movie
I love Christmas… mostly for the naps
I told my bank account about Christmas It cried

Kids Christmas Joke 👦👧🎅

What do elves use to clean Santa’s sleigh 🧽 Santatizer
Why was the snowman smiling 😊 He saw the snowblower coming
What kind of ball doesn’t bounce ⚾ A snowball
Where do snowmen go to dance 💃 To a snowball
Why did Rudolph cross the road 🚸 Because he was tied to the sleigh
What’s a snowman’s favorite breakfast 🥣 Frosted Flakes
How does Santa stay so fit 🏋️ Chimney reps
Why did the Christmas tree go to school 📚 It wanted to be brighter
What do snowmen wear on their heads 🎩 Ice caps
Why did the elf go to therapy 🛋️ He had low elf-esteem
What’s Santa’s favorite pizza topping 🍕 Ho-pepperoni
What do you call Santa when he acts up 😜 Krisp Kringle
What does Santa do when the sleigh breaks down 🔧 He uses a ho-ho-honda
Why are elves so short 📏 Because they only work a small shift
Why don’t reindeer use cell phones 📵 They’re afraid of getting “cell” frost

SNL Christmas Joke Swap Highlights 🧑‍🎤📺

Colin: I gave my wife a vacuum and now I sleep on the porch
Che: Santa sliding down chimneys? Bro’s committing B&E
Jost: Elves filed a class action for unsafe conditions
Che: Rudolph lights up but my ex still ghosted me
Jost: Frosty applied for a green card
Che: The Grinch stole more than Christmas—he took my Uber
Jost: Grandma got run over because she voted wrong
Che: My Christmas budget is just vibes
Jost: Mistletoe is now a workplace violation
Che: Santa got canceled for chimney surveillance
Jost: I found coal in my stocking—it’s worth more than my crypto
Che: Elves unionized and now make NFTs
Jost: Eggnog sales are up, just like bad decisions
Che: Reindeer now require W-2s
Jost: Santa’s workshop runs on unpaid joy

Tell Me a Christmas Joke 😄🎁

What do you call Santa when he takes a break ⏸️ Santa Pause
How does an elf get to the top floor of the workshop 🛗 By the elf-evator
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations 🤒 Tinsel-itis
Why did the gingerbread man go to school 🍬 To become a smart cookie
What do you call a cat on the beach during Christmas 🐱 Sandy Claws
What’s Santa’s dog called 🐶 Santa Paws
Why did Santa go to art school 🎨 To improve his draw
What’s the best thing to put in a Christmas cookie 🍪 Your teeth
What does Santa use to measure 🎄 A Santa-meter
Why are Christmas trees bad at knitting 🧶 They always drop their needles
What happens if you cross a bell with a skunk 🔔 A jingle smell
What did the reindeer say before lifting weights 💪 I’m going to sleigh this workout
Why did the snowman turn down a drink 🍹 He didn’t want to melt
What’s a Christmas tree’s favorite candy 🍭 Orna-mints
Why did Santa win an award 🏆 Because he sleighed it