Looking for endless laughs and lighthearted fun? 340+ Dad Joke Book; Hilarious Puns and Clean Comedy (2025) is your ultimate source of giggles and groans!
Packed with timeless puns, witty wordplay, and family-friendly humor, this updated collection guarantees smiles for all ages.
Whether you’re cracking a joke at the dinner table, lightening the mood at work, or simply want to brighten your day, these jokes never go out of style.
In 2025, dad jokes are trending more than ever—bringing humor, positivity, and connection in a world that needs more laughter.
Get ready to laugh without limits!
Best Dad Joke Book
🤣 These classic picks are timeless groaners found in top-rated dad joke books:
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other 🦴 They don’t have the guts
- I only know 25 letters of the alphabet 🔤 I don’t know y
- What did the ocean say to the beach 🌊 Nothing, it just waved
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high 😳 She looked surprised
- Want to hear a construction joke 🏗️ I’m still working on it
- I used to hate facial hair 😶 But then it grew on me
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes 🥚 They’d crack each other up
- I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon 📦 I’ll let you know
- Why did the scarecrow win an award 🌾 He was outstanding in his field
- I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went 🌞 Then it dawned on me
- My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo 🦩 So I had to put my foot down
- Why did the math book look sad ➗ Too many problems
- Parallel lines have so much in common 📐 It’s a shame they’ll never meet
- I used to play piano by ear 🎹 Now I use my hands
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours 🧀 Nacho cheese
Dad Joke Book Near Me
🗺️ Local laugh finds you’ll want to carry home:
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity 📚 It’s impossible to put down
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants ⛳ In case he got a hole in one
- I told my dog ten jokes 🐶 He said they were ruff
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym 💪 Because some relationships don’t work out
- I used to be addicted to soap 🧼 But now I’m clean
- Why did the tomato turn red 🍅 It saw the salad dressing
- What do you call a fake noodle 🍝 An impasta
- I only know one joke about umbrellas ☔ But it tends to go over people’s heads
- My dad always said laughter is the best medicine 🤧 Unless you have diarrhea
- Why did the coffee file a police report ☕ It got mugged
- How does a penguin build its house 🐧 Igloos it together
- I gave all my dead batteries away 🔋 Free of charge
- I’ve got a joke about time travel ⏳ But you didn’t like it
- I told my wife she was average 😬 She said that was mean
- Why don’t graveyards ever get overcrowded ⚰️ People are dying to get in
Dad Joke Book Funny Jokes for Adults Clean
😆 Family-friendly but grown-up approved:
- I bought shoes from a drug dealer 👟 I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day
- I used to play triangle in a reggae band 🔺 But I had to quit — it was just one ting after another
- I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes 🤗 She gave me a hug
- Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon 🎈 Because she’ll let it go
- I wanted to be a baker 🍞 But I couldn’t make enough dough
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms ⚛️ Because they make up everything
- I started a band called 999MB 💾 We haven’t got a gig yet
- I was going to tell a joke about time ⌚ But you wouldn’t get it
- Did you hear about the kidnapping at school 💤 It’s fine, he woke up
- I broke my finger last week ☝️ On the other hand, I’m okay
- I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger 🥏 Then it hit me
- I’m on a seafood diet 🐟 I see food and I eat it
- Why did the computer go to therapy 💻 It had too many bytes
- I lost my job at the bank 🏦 A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over
- What does a lemon say when it answers the phone 🍋 Yellow
Dad Joke Book Kmart
🛒 Store-friendly laughs straight from the aisles:
- Why did the shopper bring string to the store 🧵 In case they got tied up
- I asked for a book on paranoia 😬 They whispered, “It’s right behind you”
- I tried to catch some fog at Kmart 🌫️ Mist
- Don’t trust atoms at Kmart ⚛️ They make up everything
- Kmart had a sale on ladders 🪜 It was a step in the right direction
- I saw a Kmart employee sleeping in the shoe aisle 💤 They were loafering around
- I got locked in Kmart overnight 🔒 But I came out with great savings
- They had a deal on light bulbs 💡 It was a bright idea
- I found a broken clock in Kmart 🕒 It was time-consuming
- They ran out of toilet paper 🧻 That’s the bottom line
- I bought a belt at Kmart 👖 It was a waist of money
- Bought a fake Christmas tree 🎄 It was a conifer scam
- They had invisible ink on sale ✒️ I couldn’t see the point
- Kmart had a buy-one-get-one-free sale 🎁 I got twice the regret
- I asked for a deal on jokes 🤡 They said, “You’re already getting one”
Dad Joke Book Target
🎯 Aim for laughter with these dad-approved quips:
- Target’s self-checkout is so smart 🤖 It just scanned me for dad vibes
- Bought a pun calendar 📅 It was punbelievable
- I asked a Target employee if they had jokes 🤨 They said, “You’re looking at one”
- I used to work at Target 🎯 But I always missed the point
- I got a blender on sale 🥤 Now I’m whirled famous
- They had a mirror in every aisle 🪞 I kept running into myself
- I walked into a lamp aisle 💡 Totally lit
- Target’s bakery is good 🥐 But their jokes are crumby
- Bought a globe 🌍 Now I’ve got the whole world in my hands
- Target had a sale on dad jokes 📚 Priceless
- I bought a ladder there 🪜 It’s been an uplifting experience
- Got batteries on sale 🔋 Charged my sense of humor
- Their frozen section is so cool ❄️ It gives me chills
- Target had invisible man action figures 🕴️ I couldn’t see the appeal
- I told the manager I wanted more puns 💬 They said, “You’re already full of them”
The Big Book of Dad Jokes: Terribly Good Personalized Dad Joke Book
📘 A grand collection worthy of your shelf (or personalized gift):
- Personalized jokes? I nose best 👃
- This book’s spine is stronger than my actual one 🦴
- I gave this as a gift 🎁 Now my friend’s kids won’t talk to me
- It’s got more puns than a pirate convention 🏴☠️
- This book came with a warning label ⚠️ May cause uncontrollable groaning
- My dad read this and started a pun podcast 🎙️ Now I’m legally changing my name
- I bookmarked the worst joke 📌 All of them
- Reading this at bedtime 😴 Now my kids fake sleep
- Best part? It’s personalized 🔤 Worst part? So are the jokes
- It’s full of dad-isms 🧓 But dangerously funny
- This book made me a dad joke ninja 🥷 I strike when least expected
- I laughed so hard, I snorted 📣 Now the dog avoids me
- It’s the ultimate cringe kit 😂 Wrapped in a cover
- A joke per page 📖 But therapy might cost more
- I tried to return it 🛍️ But the cashier made a pun and I gave up
Dad Joke Book PDF
📄 Digital delights you can download and groan over:
- Why did the PDF file cross the road 📁 To get to the next punchline
- I downloaded 100 jokes 💾 Still not enough to impress my kids
- PDF jokes don’t fold 📄 But they’ll still crease your soul
- Read it on the toilet 🚽 Multi-tasking level: dad
- Opened the file 📂 Got hit with a pun tsunami
- Shared the PDF with my boss 🧑💼 Got promoted for morale boosting
- Printed the jokes 🖨️ My printer sighed
- PDF is portable 🙌 But the embarrassment is permanent
- You don’t need bookmarks 🔖 You’ll remember the pain
- Great for flights ✈️ Your seatmate might change seats
- It’s searchable 🔍 For the least funny one
- Sent it to my crush ❤️ Got ghosted, worth it
- Works on every device 📱 Especially dad’s cracked screen
- No shipping, just zipping 📬 And endless punning
- Perfect for new dads 👶 Or seasoned comedians with no shame
New Dad Joke Book
🍼 For fresh fathers full of new puns:
- I just became a dad 🤱 Time to level up my pun game
- Why don’t babies ever get lost 🧭 They follow the paci-finder
- My kid’s first word was “ugh” 😫 After hearing my jokes
- I told my newborn a joke 🐣 They spit up — success
- I asked the doctor if laughter is good medicine 🩺 He said not for this many puns
- New dad starter pack 🧰 Diapers, coffee, and this joke book
- I tried to swaddle my sense of humor 🛌 But it kept escaping
- My kid sleeps soundly 😴 Because I already bored them with jokes
- First bath time 🛁 I made bubble puns. Wife left the room
- Burping the baby 🍼 And the punchlines
- Changed my voice for storytime 📚 Now my jokes have accents
- Read a pun while feeding 🥄 Baby laughed or burped — I call it a win
- Diaper blowout 💥 Joke blowout, same thing
- Told my baby about taxes 💸 They cried for both reasons
- New dad, old puns 👴 Timeless combo
Conclusion
Whether you’re a pun pro or a groaning victim, this dad joke book guide delivers the laughs in every format—from shelves to screens.
With options from local stores, funny clean picks, personalized books, and PDFs, you’ve got no excuse not to start the pun-ishment.
It’s time to embrace your inner dad joke champion.